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You know things are going downhill when one of the leaders of original software licences a coin-op. Simulation masters MicroProse have bowed to the public and released their first arcade conversion, Xenophobe. A strange choice for a licence considering that the coin-op wasn't all that hot. A bit stale as I remember.

So what better way to freshen it up than use a bit of originality, a touch of style and flair, or perhaps a whacking great bug. A steaming great bug. A bug so foul that it hides within the code during game testing, then leaps out at the unsuspecting punter and completely ruins his game by scrolling from room to room. A slip in standards from Stealey and the boys, and one I hope only temporary.

But now to the game. You are an alien buster (for alien read 'ghost') and your mission is thus. Travel to the alien-infested space stations and wipe them out (the invaders that is, not the space stations!). As space stations go, these ones are quite small. Each one is made up of around a dozen rooms, and because it's circular, the map is wraparound.

In one of the rooms there is a computer screen, and it's on this screen you monitor your progress via a percentage display. The more you kill, the lower the percentage.

The aliens come on-screen from both sides are killed by simply shooting. The bigger the creature, the more hits it takes. Large ones rush you and knock you into other rooms, while small slime-like nasties grab onto your leg and drain your energy and have to be shook off. There are more, some of which do some really strange things, but I don't want to spoil the surprise for you.

As you go through the ships, you can pick up extra weapons, such as laser guns and smoke pistols, and food and bonus items such as jewellery, all of which you'll need if you want (a) a high score and (b) to complete the game.

The graphics aren't bad; basically they're a good copy of arcade graphics that weren't any good to start with. The backdrops are repetitive in places, and you do yearn for a greater range.

There are loads of tunes to be found within Xenophobe, along with a plethora of average sound effects, all very boom and chook.

It hurts me to say this, Xenophobe, just isn't any good. The controls are slow, and there are a lot of moments when what should be a frantic shoot-'em-up is nothing more than a tedious blast. That coupled with 'the bug' makes Xenophobe a bit of a bummer. Who'd have thought the day would come when I'd give a MicroProse game a bad review? Doomsday is upon us.