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We don't need or want crap games on the ST. If we only have three new releases a month, we want them to be at least halfway playable. Bart Vs. The World isn't.

The theory behind the game is incredibly confused, but basically, it means you have to pick up loads of collectibles which are scattered throughout the different levels - or worlds - if you don't want Bart and his family to be wiped off the face of the earth. Once you've played through the game a bit you probably won't care less whether you save Bart or not, but hey! reviews are supposed to be analytical and constructive, so let's go through it bit by bit.

The introduction isn't too bad, the background's set and you're left to get on with playing your way through all the worlds. The first stop is China. On the screen you can choose three games to play - there's also an exit sign and another game symbol which is "greyed out". Once you've played your way through one of the accessible games you can get to the fourth game, and once you've completed all four games you can exit to meet the end-of-world baddie, cunningly disguised as the Burns Boss. Then you can move on.

If any thought had gone into this game at all there would have been an option whereby you could save your positions - either at the end of a level or after you've completed a single game, or at least something somewhere. As it is you have to plough your way through one of those slidey puzzle things - there are 15 tiles on a board with space for 16 and put in the right order they make up an illustration; a card memory game where you have to make pairs but you get so few turns that there's no way you can do it if you make even one mistake, unless you're incredibly busy.

On top of this there are a couple of games that Virgin optimistically describe as "main". First there's a sort of mini platformer in which you jump about on a boat picking things up. It's dead easy to find the exit here - all you have to do to complete this biy is go straight there... and leave. Admittedly you miss out on the chance to pick up more collectibles, but if you just want to progress, that's all you have to do.

The joystick control is so abysmal and the screen so flickery, however, that's likely to be all you have the patience for. Finally in this country there's the Great Wall of China - Bart's back on his skateboard on a one way trip along a wall trying to avoid the holes and gaps between sections. It's very tricky, largely because the control mechanism is so bad. And that's it.

The end-of-world baddie doesn't appear to be a great challenge - just throw a few things at him and you've won. You progress in this way through the four levels, but when you die you have to start at the beginning again.

The problem is that in actual fact the levels aren't actually very big - not are they particularly enjoyable. Sliding puzzles are very well, but surely no-one wants to be bothered to play them time and time again? It's more of a punishment than a pleasure. Appallingly bad sound and simple graphics - you haven't got much of a winner on your hands - the only decent bit is Bart's sprite which they must have taken from the original game. What's the point of sticking a few unoriginal puzzles together in what could have been a semi-decent game? After all, the original Bart was pretty amazing compared to this.

This game is not one to recommend, not least because you have to go back to the beginning so often that this level is likely to be in your nightmares for months.

1. Keeps you going, if not entertained, for ages.

1. Pretty much everything, really!