Okay, so you don't have a disk drive and you don't have £14.99 and you think that the Valley's getting too elitist. So what say you to a very tasty two-part 96K adventure with 170 graphic screens, stacks of puzzles and a virtually faultless parser for just £1.99? It's called Se-Kaa Of Assiah and it's from Mastertronic - who else?
As the game begins, you find yourself wandering in a countryside near a small village. Further exploration brings you to the gates of Castle Dread, where you're meant to retrieve three sacred artefacts and return them to their rightful place. Only trouble is, it's half-day closing - or something like that.
Must be a key somewhere. Back to the village. Ah - a well! No, nothing down there. Stumble around a little more and suddenly a cloak appears from the heavens, and then a gem-studded staff. Funny - they weren't here the first time.
Seems you have to make a few moves and then return to the right locations before they'll consider showing up. Now I've counted sixteen locations and no way I can reach any others.
Just when I'm beginning to think that this is a very silly game, Beerd arrives with some more information about my tasks and then leaves with the news that he's left the castle doors open for me - but lost souls roam there. Charming.
Back to the castle, and I'm in. Nice graphics, and the old red carpet shows me all the permitted moves in here. Don't hang about though - 'cos if you do, those horrible little purple wraiths will get you. Ooops, I've moved somewhere I shouldn't and I'm falling through space. It's all gone dark. I'm in a huge black room. But wait, I can just make out something drawn on the wall. It's a Chad saying, "Wot, No headache!"...
Se-Kaa Of Assiah is terrific value for money, offering all the quality, entertainment and features you'd expect from more expensive games. Graphics are very good, there's a help feature, and you can save a game whenever you wish.