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With England qualifying for the European championships and Gary Lineker finally finding his scoring form again, Gremlin could not have picked a better time to be sponsored by England's most revered striker. But Gary Lineker or not, there has not been a really good soccer arcade game for the C64 for a long time, is this the one to change that, or is it just another over-hyped mediocre effort?

Before you actually get down to the serious business of playing football, you must go through the compulsory trivialities such as picking your team's colours, selecting how long you wish the matches to be, and whether you wish to play the computer or a friend. All this is fairly straightforward, until you come to selecting the team you wish to be. Casting my eye across the names of Division One teams, I noticed something was drastically wrong. No Q.P.R...! Can you imagine how I, and millions of others, must have felt. I was emotionally devastated! Come on, Gremlin! Wake up to the world of class football!

You also have the option of not only playing your team's centre-forward, but being the brains behind the football and taking over as the coach. This involves selecting your team's strategy every time there is a stoppage in play. For instance, should you be leading by one goal, with two minutes till full-time and the opposing team have a corner, then you will want to play defensively... right? You have the option of letting the computer or a friend control your goalie. It is probably wise to let the computer do it as it is not an easy job. That is, unless your mate's is a bit of a Shilts!

Once you get down to the nitty-gritty of the big match itself, you will notice something rather strange... Each player appears to keep about two tones of solid dynamite in their boots. They make Hot Shot Hamish look like Norman Whiteside. It is not that I'm moaning about being whipped, on the contrary after only one minute, and two goal attempts on my first go I scored one from what would have been a good ninety yards. Obviously I'm used to doing this in real life (!) but I'd like to find opponents that can at least attempt to hold me in a computer game!

The players also have an uncanny knack at the ol' overhead kick. When the ball is in the air, a simple well-timed flick of the fire button will send your player soaring acrobatically into the air and thumping the ball goalwards. A manoeuvre Mirandinha would be proud of. But don't think this piece of skill is confined to your player only. This ability is shared amongst all the players, on both teams. Another move that your player will pull off is a header, again timing is the key, press fire and your player will, with one giant leap... nut!! and it doesn't matter where he is either, the header will always leave the keeper with some work to do.

The only problem with these amazing skills is that due to rather fidgety controls, you may find it difficult to pass with certain joysticks, as I did. It can be most aggravating when in your own area you get the ball and send a long, hard, pointless boot towards the goal in true Sheff Wed fashion. When what you wanted to play was a neat little ball, favoured by superior teams such as [West Ham - MP] [Bristol City - Ed] [Q.P.R. - Me] [Er... Chicago Bears! - NK]

To be blunt, as I always try to be, Gary Lineker's does not fit the bill, as the first real football game for the C64, our wait continues. It is not totally awful, and is quite a jolly game if you don't take your football too seriously, which clearly the programmers at Mindscape don't. This is one of the pitfalls of giving the job to a bunch of Americans.

The main problem is with the playing of the game itself. The player's ability to shoot like that makes the whole thing a bit of a farce. Also, because each team has a different skill level, one team is always better than another. This is fine when you have a computer opponent and you wish to have a better/worse team than it. But when you are playing your mates you want to be dead equal, all square, before a ball is kicked. If not arguments along the popular line of "5-0, Ha-Ha!" "Not fair! Your team's a higher skill than mine" "Crap! You're simply not as good as me!" develop, as they do, when you're playing with such a juvenile team as the CU crew.

If you're desperate for a footer game, there are worse about. But don't expect too much.