Previous Next

Better make sure you have a joystick constructed of titanium for this one. It's a scrolly beat-'em-up based on the film featuring that placid, timid conscientious objector Arnie Schwarzenbergermergendorfer. He plays a Russian dick [That's American for detective - Ed] who has teamed up with an American Dickski [That's 'detective' in defective Russian - Ed] in order to break up a Soviet drug-smuggling operation. In the game, only the Russian appears.

Actually it's all pretty tedious. You move along a scrolling backdrop, minding your own business until a group of adversaries try to 'ave a go. Then you either head butt or punch them. There are a few in-betweeny screens to break up the monotony of the levels but all in all it's pretty poor, which is sad really as the graphics are fine.

No amount of snazzy digitized graphics can mask a repetitive and ultimately annoying beat-'em-up. Give this Arnie blarney a wide berth.