Now you look like a gambling gent so can I interest you in The Sport of Kings - all for the princely sum of £2.99?
And we're not talking gee-gees but laundry... namely how to lose your shirt on a line of winners.
First thing to do is state the number of players, how many horses will run in the season and what factors will affect results - the more the merrier. Then, because you wouldn't want to waste your money on maidens, make a slow cup of tea while it auto-runs some races.
Consult the race card and peek at the form book to check who rode that dead cert to win over what trip.
Now to the bookies, honest as the day is long, chewing on a fat cigar. You've got a choice of win and each/way flutters, plus straight and reverse forecasts - you can even stake money you don't have which strikes me as unrealistic, unless the program later breaks your legs!
Everybody makes their selections and places their bets.
The race itself has nice graphics with touches like waving spectators and, then it's collect your winnings or take out a second mortgage.
I can't see this being one of Mastertronic's biggest sellers. To anybody who isn't a disciple of the Tote it's likely to appear slow and boring.
Jerry Muir
Publisher: MAD Games
Programmer: Jeff Calder
Price: £2.99
Memory: 48K
Joystick: Protek, Cursor, Kempston, Interface II