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What I need in my games is... action. I was to cruise the universe with a laser in my hand and a gleam in my eye leaving a wake of death and destruction. I mean, I wanna *kill*.

Somehow puttering around the landscape in a JCB Digger clearing undergrowth and keeping half an eye open for 'Meanies' doesn't seem to fit the bill. I say half an eye but sometimes you can fall asleep at the wheel looking for them. At one point I thought they might have followed the path of the Dodo to extinction.

A Meanie is something that gets its kicks driving JCB Diggers, yours in particular. They can be fairly easily disposed of either by pushing them into the sea or digging a hole and burying them, whereupon they drift off to sleep. Sleep? Being beanoed by three tons of rubble spells dead in this boy's book.

As I said before, Meanies are pretty scarce beasts and when you find one they ain't the brightest bucket of worms. Chances are, they'll do a runner and leave you in the middle of a Meanie-free landscape for the next fifteen minutes.

All in all, rather a pity because the graphics are stunning. But then my habit craves blood...