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Goodness gracious and lawks alordy! The most evil nasties you ever did see have invaded the world and are making it a fun place to live. The now-redundant politicians are a mite peeved, not because they've been ousted from their governing positions, but because they're all too old to take part in the fun and games organised by the fun loving aliens. So, off they all went to hire a space pilot capable of destroying the aliens, and you just happened to fit the bill perfectly.

The politicians' club fund enabled them to purchase a Soopakomplex Oneshotatatime Mark III Spacecraft to destroy the evil do-gooders. It's incapable of forward motion, but very agile at moving left and right.

Your spaceship appears at the bottom of me screen, and using your skill and judgement you must blast the aliens as they whizz down from the top of the screen. They're fairly annoyed by your intrusion into their fun end games, so they try to fly into you in a kamikaze attempt to destroy your ship. Fortunately, you can move left or right to prevent contact.

There is a number of different races of aliens, and each race attacks in a set formation. Destroy all the aliens in an attack and the next lot duly take their turn in attempting to blow you up. However, the aliens don't really look like aliens - they have transformed themselves into more traditional Earthly forms, so we don't have to endure their horrible scaly appearance. Consequently, it becomes quite comical when your ship is attacked by a load of Dodos.

Other types of nasties include 'Ackin' International Karate Maties, Killer 'Bounder' Balls, Culture Vultures, Swans, Budgies and Asteroids. There's also a special guest appearance by Squawk the Parrot and friends.

Once every sort of alien has been disposed of, the first batch return, but this time they're doubly peeved and move about at twice their original speed.

I've always thought that Firebird were a little on the stupid side, and releasing a game as dire as Galaxibirds confirms this. The programmers must be congratulated on a superb p' take of the whole shoot em up genre. You really haven't lived until you've played Galaxibirds - the game they couldn't stop! It's so absurd it's almost worth two quid.

Zap, zap, zappity, zap. Galaxibirds has just got to be one mega p' take. I mean, it all seems so simple and normal (!) to begin with, but when such things as Bounder balls, angels, and mutant parrots start coming down from the lofty heights, then the game takes a humourous turn for the better. The graphics are naff, the sound is as about exciting as wet weekend, but at two quid it's a must for ageing blast em up freaks.

To be honest, this game is a load of rubbish, but it's very enjoyable rubbish and great fun to play. There are plenty of jokes within the program, both in the scrolling message on the title screen and in the game itself. The scenario is one which has been seen a million times before and the gameplay is out of the ark. Graphics are poor, sound is awful, but I love it. Go out and give it a go, for only two quid it almost seems worth buying.

Presentation 82%
Two player option, and nice title screen with humourous scrolling message and hi-score table.

Graphics 54%
Good sprites, but little else.

Sound 49%
A silly tune burbles away during the game, and the spot FX suit the game well.

Hookability 73%
You've just got to see all ten levels.

Lastability 50%
It's a hard game, but very repetitive.

Value For Money 68%
Two quid isn't really asking too much.

Overall 60%
Unoriginal, naff and silly. Buy it for a laugh.