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There now follows a Public Information Announcement. Reports have been filed of a cute miniature elephant having breached security measures at London Zoo. Although the whereabouts of the animal are still a mystery, keepers are going on the Stena Sealink receipt and Paris hotel reservation found in his compound that suggest he may be trying to leave for the continent and then Africa.

Speaking for the zoo, spokesman Ernest Budgen said they had no idea why the packiderm would abscound except for reasons of puerile publicity. "He had just signed a contract with a video game company, er, Codemeister or something," explained Mr. Budgen. "I suppose all the furore surrounding the escape will help sell their platform game." Mr. Budgen is 43.

CJ lets you come together in that most intimate of Game Gear pastimes, the two-player link. But instead of two-way elephant 'fun', this special option is a nifty little race game. Sadly, you can't participate on your own, but it's a handy thing to know.

CJ goes down in history as the first terrorist elephant. Behind that cutesy facade is a fanatical character, capable of throwing bombs to aid his progress, or even shooting lethal peanuts from his trunk. In fact, so shocked are the various snails, rats, Egyptian mummies, etc. that he goes across, they immediately turn into a piece of fruit! Or even some more bombs! Bizarre.

They say elephants never forget, but even CJ would be hard-pressed to remember this little romp. I have to say I found it pretty banal. This sort of dull platform romp has been re-run to death and there's nothing new here. I was also annoyed that CJ kept dropping his bombs when I didn't want him to. The programming is competent, even some of the graphics are good, but it's wasted effort when the game is so shallow.

Oh, deary, deary me, I do believe I'm suffering from Deja-Vu! A game where a cutesy sprite makes his way across a series of dangerous countries? And the customary bosses making an appearance every now and then?

Blimey, if CJ Elephant Fugitive isn't just a retread of every other platformer known to man, I'll eat my undies. Granted, it's moderately playable, but where's the originality - where's that little something to entice you further in? Not here, that's for sure! Decidedly average.

Presentation 67%
The special game for two players is a nice idea.

Graphics 74%
Nicely coloured and quite well defined but very unimaginative.

Sound 68%
Average music, neither aurally offensive or appealing.

Playability 56%
The banality of the gameplay produces almost instant boredom.

Lastability 47%
There are seven stages, none of them memorable.

Overall 53%
What the Game Gear really doesn't need - another dull platform game.