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You've heard of King Arthur, Merlin and Camelot. Well now we have Artura, Merdyn and Camelod. Er... yeah.

Anyway, this Artura chap wnts to unify Albion (the British Isles, dummy). Trouble is, he can't do it until he gets hold of the sacred Treasures of Albion and the only person who knows how to find them is Merdyn. Unfortunately, Merdyn's been a bit careless and well... er... he's vanished. The only person who knows where *he* is happens to be Nimue, but... wait for it, she's been kidnapped - by Morgause, Artura's sister, to be exact.

You've got yourself involved in this boring plot so it's up to you to get Nimue out. She's in Morgause's castle, guarded by soldiers, rats and flying chickens. Oh yeah, and the castle hides a set of runes that you need to collect as well. Get them all and Albion is unified, fail and it's not. Gripping, eh?

There must be something good that I can say about Artura. Erm, let me think. Well... uh, the artwork in the packaging is quite nice - and it loads. As for the rest of it - I recommend it to the sort of pervies who enjoy burning money, drinking petrol, sleeping on tin tacks and sticking needles in their eyes.

If you want bug-eyed blockman graphics, rasping beeps and as much gameplay as you'd get in a dead rat, rush out and buy this now. Everyone else: put your head through a meat-grinder first.

I've seen some really mediocre games in my time but Artura doesn't even ran as one of them!

Nobody in their right minds should permit a set of graphics as jerky and badly designed as this to enter their home - this sort of thing is dangerous. As for gameplay - I'd mention it if there was any to speak of, but there isn't. Moving around a samey, boring and confusing castle is about as varied as watching paint dry and a lot less fun.

If someone threatens to give you this, tell them not to!

Presentation 21%
Well, there's a scrolling message at the start and that's about it.

Graphics 15%
Blocky sprites, lumpy chickens and washed-out brickwork - yuk!

Sound 17%
Beeps, bleeps and beeps.

Hookability 11%
It can't be this bad, can it?

Lastability 8%
Er... yes it can.

Overall 10%
See it and avoid it. Any closer and it could damage your health.