Mean Machines Sega


Aaahh!!! Real Monsters

Publisher: Viacom
Machine: Sega Mega Drive (EU Version)

 
Published in Mean Machines Sega #39

Aaahh! Real Monsters

There were Viacom, sitting in their plush offices when someone shouted "Let's make a game out of Aaahh! Real Monsters." Maybe a flash of inspiration told them that a three character game where each has special abilities would bring something new to the games world. After all, we've never seen anything like that before, have we?

Anyway, the adventures of Oblina, Krumm and Ickus are reasonably successful and are not that bad a cartoon to port over a game. Obviously, there are the different characters, and the possibility of scaring the crap out of a few people sounds like a bit of a laff as well. So, nice ingredients, but how does it taste?

Pant-Soilingtime

Each of the characters has a special clear-everything-on-screen move in which they suddenly decide to pull one of their most scary faces so everything nearby promptly cacks itself and does a runner! You only have a few of these moves, but more can be collecting by grabbing the books marked 'M'. Quite what M stands for is beyond us. Lucy suggested minging, whatever that means this side of the Watford Gap.

Marcus

The product of what fevered minds was this, I wonder? Aarrh Real Monsters is so bizarre that at times it's difficult not to like it. Any game where you flush yourself around various toilets to the accompaniment of a Carry-On-style soundtrack can't be all bad, but sadly, this very nearly is.

The control procedures become tedious and neither the graphics nor the gameplay come close to matching the imaginative ideas behind this title. And although this is a fairly amusing game, the most ridiculous thing about it remains the price.

Steve

Aahhh! Why me? Sorry, but this is my only reaction to reviewing a game like this. The potential for a good game is there, but sadly everything has all fallen into the depths of Real Monster world. The graphics are bland to say the least, and could have been so much more colourful.

The characters, although funny at first with their scare 'em things and link up moves, soon become frustrating when you have to have them all on one tiny platform to perform a link up. And why aren't there any really blood-curdling screams? Aaahh! Take it away!

Verdict

Graphics 64%
The backdrops are dull and colourless.

Effects 63%
Screams sound like mice squeaks.

Animation 62%
Each character seems to have about two frames, if you're lucky.

Playability 58%
It all gets frustrating far too easily.

Music 70%
Eerie tunes are quite effective, and not too repetitive.

Lastability 59%
You'll get more like from an ice cube in an oven.

Overall 61%
Aaaaaaaaarrrrrrrrggggggghhhhhhhh!!!