Hey - wow - guys, look what I've got. It's this really magical tart program that allows you to read your own trot on the Spectrum, and who cares if the spelling isn't all ii could be - at least its a positive alternative to killing all of those space invaders, guys. Guys?

Those who like such things will be better suited to deciding whether a computer-dealt nine card spread from the Minor Arcana is a valid method of divination, or just for the divvies. It all works efficiently enough, with the cards turning up one by one and an interpretation scrolling beneath them. Meanwhile music burbles endlessly and mystically away in the background.

Frankly I'd even have preferred the chance of a glimpse of Sam Fox's digitised doo-dahs, but then again, I always was a knocker when it came to matters mysterious. Those of a more gullible bent.... sorry, on a higher plane, can contact Psychic at 38 Dawn Walk, Liverpool L10 4YD, but as far as I'm concerned its a load of old crystal balls.