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"Hey, guys. I just had a great idea in the bath. How about a game about a Porsche?"

"Triff, boss. And we could get a major tyre company like Dunlop Tyres SP Tyres UK Ltd to endorse it."

"Won't that cost greenbackwise?"

"No way. All we have to do is underline Dunlop Tyres wherever it appears on the insert and in the game. We could only allow players to use Dunlop tyres in the game. The possibilities hype wise are endlessville, boss."

"I like the way you're thinking. What do the programmers reckon on schedules? Can you do it for Monday, kid?"

"Uh, like, that's a bit heavy. I mean, I was going to take Sharon to the Motorhead concert tonight..."

"No sweat. Just lay down that old scrolling routine we used in all the other games."

"But the Porsche doesn't jump fences like the horses in Grand National, boss."

"So what? Put some bushes and logs n' stuff in the middle of the road. I saw this great ZX-81 game a couple of years ago in a mag which scrolled up the screen with bushes and things. You remember - I was playing it in the bath when I got the idea for Kokotoni Wimp."

"Don't you think the punters will notice?"

"Punters? Shmucks. No more arguments, boys, or its P45 city for the lot of you. Besides, when they see Dunlop Tyres all over the cassette they won't bother about the rest. We're talking action, we're talking hype, we're talking spondulistani... "

911TS. Another great game from Elite. Don't buy it.